Dear Gentlemen of Comics...Can We Talk?


tessfowler:

Laying my sword down for a second. You’re safe here. I’m not going to hack you to pieces. For the moment, at least. (See? That’s a joke. I’m normal just like you. I make jokes too.) But I warn you, this is probably not something you want to hear. Don’t be scared though….

Tacos and beers and donating moneys with a group!


tacoorbeerchallenge:

Taco AND beer challenge completed by myself (Janelle Asselin), Paul Moore, Liz Marsham, and Nachie Marsham. (My donation only pictured - we donated even more than that!) Photo montage!

Because I can email people and be like “tacos and beers and funding abortions?” and they will be like “YES” and that’s my weekend because I know the best of people.

Taco AND beer challenge completed by myself (Janelle Asselin), Paul Moore, Liz Marsham, and Nachie Marsham. (My donation only pictured - we donated even more than that!) Photo montage!

If you want to know more, check this out: http://tacoorbeerchallenge.tumblr.com

yoisthisracist:

kateceratops posted this:

People are giving Wilson money to thank him for killing an unarmed black teenager. Please report this to GoFundMe, as it violates their Terms of Service and they get 5% of the tens of thousands of dollars being donated. Click to report.
This is my message, in case you want to copy and paste:
Your Terms of Service prohibit “items that promote… hate, racial intolerance, or the financial exploitation of a crime.” Take a look at the comments that come with the donations on this page and tell me that doesn’t violate your terms. “Support Officer Wilson” is a thin veil for people rewarding Wilson for killing a black kid.

yoisthisracist:

kateceratops posted this:

People are giving Wilson money to thank him for killing an unarmed black teenager. Please report this to GoFundMe, as it violates their Terms of Service and they get 5% of the tens of thousands of dollars being donated. Click to report.

This is my message, in case you want to copy and paste:

Your Terms of Service prohibit “items that promote… hate, racial intolerance, or the financial exploitation of a crime.” Take a look at the comments that come with the donations on this page and tell me that doesn’t violate your terms. “Support Officer Wilson” is a thin veil for people rewarding Wilson for killing a black kid.

(via evilmarguerite)

hereonmystar:

thefatgawd:

dragonheartedrabbit:

"Waste of good ammo. It’s my privilege to buy you a replacement box."

"All self-respecting whites have a moral responsibility to support our growing number of martyrs to the failed experiment called diversity."

"I thank all Police, you are the ‘Thin Blue Line’ protecting normal Americans from aggressive and entitled primitive savages. America is surely at the tipping point."

Just a few quotes (in case it’s hard to read) from that collection of donation messages for Darren Wilson.

Does anyone else want to say it’s not about race?

This is why white people get side-eyed. Some of these people are your aunts and uncles.

I am so fucking disgusted by people right now. 

(via evilmarguerite)

extendedburning:

godtxt:

please do not let ferguson die out like everything else big does. do not let this die out. do not let this continue on for three days and then everyone forget about it. do not let this happen.

queue this post up 3 days from now, a week from now, a month from now, a month from then. make sure even if you forget your blog will remember.

(Source: angel-scum, via evilmarguerite)

#britches

(Source: tortillah, via hellogiggles)

How My Ex Became a Rapist


Huge trigger warning on this one for rape.

ibelieveyouitsnotyourfault:

by Irena

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Me

When his dick slammed into my ass uninvited, I didn’t want it to be rape. I spent the panicked and painful seconds as my entire body went stiff thinking maybe this was normal. Maybe, despite all I’d read and all I knew, fucking your girlfriend in the ass without consent, warning, or lubrication was just a thing people did. I would have laughed at the idea from anyone else, but there, in that moment, I thought maybe it was an okay thing for him to have done, because I didn’t want him to be a rapist.

When I lay down next to him, shaking and still in pain, I fought hard to get any words out at all. Because if I didn’t say anything, it would be normal and okay and he wouldn’t be a rapist. But I had enough strength to stammer out, “I’m trying to decide whether to be mad at you, for not asking.”

And he laughed gently and said it had been an accident. And I was so relieved because that was a better story than the one I’d been trying to tell. So I accepted it, and I pushed down the part of my brain that remembered the feel of his dick probing, poking before he went in. The part that said it had felt deliberate. And I shut down the doubts and the outrage when he asked immediately afterward, “…but is that something you’d be into?” Because I didn’t want him to be a rapist.

And when it happened again, weeks later, all I did was loudly say, “OW” (because my god, it hurt) and I let him say “Oops, sorry,” and that was the end of it. But I did wonder more, after that. I thought of writing to people, Dan Savage or somebody, asking, “Could this have been an accident? Is that something that happens?” (Because it hadn’t felt like an accident.) (But he was my boyfriend and my girlfriend’s husband and I didn’t want him to be a rapist.)

And then I broke up with him because I just wasn’t feeling it anymore. And he was angry and sad and argued that I hadn’t given him enough of a chance to really get to know and love him. (And he said “I’m sorry” for the accidental anal thing, and that it was totally understandable I’d have some reservations about sex with him after that. Would a rapist say that?) And I was guilty and terrified of being left alone, so we got back together.

And I was miserable for several months, but at least there were no more accidents, and then I finally broke up with him again, and this time he let me go. He felt I’d given him enough of a chance, this time. We stayed friends, because his wife was dating my husband, and we wanted to be one happy family. So that accidental anal thing was unfortunate, and I suddenly had a bunch of sexual hang-ups I hadn’t had before, but it was long in the past, and the important thing was that he wasn’t a rapist.

Her

He had one date with my new boyfriend’s girlfriend. And afterward my boyfriend said she had been “uncomfortable” and he had been “insistent.” And I objected to the use of the word insistent, because he was a feminist and he blogged about consent, and I might not much like him anymore, but “insistent” sounded too close to calling him a rapist, which he definitely wasn’t. And my boyfriend let it go.

When he kissed her at a party without warning, with her hands full so she couldn’t push him away, I agreed that that was bad. That he really needed to be more attentive to other people’s needs and wants. That I was going to be watching him like a hawk and calling him out if he did that to her again. Because he was pretty entitled and pretty oblivious and people needed to start calling him on stuff like that. Because he’d really been crossing some consent lines with her, and he’d be the last one to want to do that if he realized. Because I’d been living with him for over a year, and however pushy and self-serving he was, he was definitely not a rapist.

When she told me what had actually happened between them I felt sick. That he had invited himself to her house. That he had walked into her bedroom, despite her attempts to deflect him back downstairs. That he had closed the door she’d carefully left wide open, and kicked her dog out of the room. That at that point she had felt too afraid to say no when he kissed her. That she had instead just dissociated and let him do what he wanted (which was not everything, but enough that she had to take four showers afterward and still didn’t feel clean.) That she had told him the next day how uncomfortable it made her, and he had joked about it, and she told him again, and he made another joke, and she told him again, and he still took it lightly, and she told him a fourth time, and he finally said okay, sorry.

And even though by this time I nearly hated him, he still wasn’t a rapist. Because he was a feminist and blogged about consent, and was in relationships with other women who loved and trusted him deeply, and so many of our mutual friends liked him and thought he was a great guy, if a little aggressive with his opinions. And my husband and I had our own conflicts with him, so how could I be sure I was judging without bias?

And finally, months and months later, when he was confronted about what he had done to her, he lied. He said she was being aggressive and even though he wasn’t sure he wanted to, he went along with sexual contact because she seemed to expect it, and he felt too awkward and uncomfortable to say no. (He also apologized profusely for causing her trauma, even though he denied responsibility for it, and showed — for the first time in the ten months since it happened — eloquent concern for what she’d suffered. Would a rapist do that? Yes. A rapist would, if he was a savvy feminist rapist who blogged about consent and knew that a profuse apology was the only acceptable response here.) And I knew, because one of them had to be lying, and I had no doubt about which one it was.

But it was hard to say it to myself, because could that really be possible? Could someone I knew, and had been friends-then-frenemies-then-enemies with for years actually be a rapist? The hard part is not believing that this specific person is a rapist: the hard part is believing that anyone I know could be a rapist. But I too am a feminist who blogs about consent, and I know the stats. Most of us know someone who is a rapist. That is a fact. It is not so extraordinary that I might know a rapist; it would be somewhat extraordinary if I didn’t. And if I think over everyone I know, to think who is most likely to be a rapist, and a liar, and a skillful manipulator, the answer is trivially easy.

I believe her. I believe myself.

My ex is a rapist.

It’s not our fault.

- Irena

Spider-woman and Sexual Portrayals of Women


amyreeder:

So many opinions on the interwebs these days! You guys know I tend to stay out of this stuff, but I actually have something valuable to say…or so I feel.

If you want to know my opinion on Milo Manara’s Spider-woman cover, I’m going to have to disappoint you and say I feel super divided on it. I love Milo Manara!! It’s a variant cover…so it’s sort of an erotica variant! Of course, I’d also like to see Katie Cook do her own version…that’d make Marvel’s choice seem a little less like a systemic problem. And yes, it’s all a different story with context, but without context, it is a bit jarring and I don’t negate that because the Internet really changes our experience these days. And the image itself does remind me a lot of images by artists I DON’T respect…I wish it looked more characteristically Manara instead of a Greg Horn illustration (sorry, Greg Horn! (Not that you care!)). Again, all that said, it’s Milo Manara and if anybody should be able to do things how he wants, it should be him.

That’s not my point. My point is, it’s not an easy thing to evaluate or explain what is okay and what’s not. Some sexy drawings of women I can get behind, some I can’t. Some of that’s context. But a lot of it is what seemed like a weird intuition that I couldn’t really pinpoint, until recently.

The word that changes everything for me is “personhood.” Does this woman seem like a person? Do they have life breathed into them? A personality? Or are they an object? Do they feel manufactured or repetitive? Would guys who like this appreciate that I am a living, breathing woman?  Or would they complain I talk too much?

This is why I love Guillem March’s work despite some weird occasional gems…He exaggerates but his women are diverse and boiling over with life. You can tell he likes the ladies, but he likes them, person and all.  I know not all women can get behind this dude, but I strongly believe we need him in this industry.

image

Compare that with this image…which appears to be a photo manip by someone named “CHOWY”…anyway, it creeps the hell out of me. Why? Because these are not presented as people; they are objects that serve a purpose. Moreover, it’s obvious I was not invited to this celebration of comics. And I like getting invitations.

image

This applies to stories, too. It’s an oldie, but I’ve always disliked the Tomb Raider movie. Female protagonist? Check. Strong? Oh yeah. Smart? Anthropologist smart! Human being? Bzzzzzzzt!!! Wrong. Hollow shell…HEY! Let’s watch her take a shower!

image

(I wish I could tie this all back to the Manara cover, but I feel like the point was that she’s Spider-woman, so she’s less human, more spider. The truth: I was just using this controversy as an excuse to get on my soapbox.)

Of course, the depressing undertone to this post is that so many guys don’t see (or don’t want to see?) women as humans. So, so weird, so sad.  I tend to surround myself with guys who think I’m human and gals who think they themselves are humans, so I can pretend this problem isn’t common.  But reality is a bastard.

Anyway. Personhood. I have a name for it and it has given a reason to my rhyme. Maybe it’s your reason, too?

Great thoughts from Amy Reeder. And I agree on Guillem March - he has his missteps but I feel like he has more to offer than some of the alternatives who do seem to only see women as sex objects. Plus, he takes notes really well and has good intentions, which is more than I can say for a fair number of other artists.

‘Shake It Off’ by Taylor SwiftCannot get this song out of my head. Can. Not.

‘Shake It Off’ by Taylor Swift
Cannot get this song out of my head. Can. Not.

Best $40 I’ve ever spent. Chogokin Hello Kitty mecha. <3 #CAcollection

Best $40 I’ve ever spent. Chogokin Hello Kitty mecha. <3 #CAcollection

kateordie:

Margaery looked very like her brother, the Knight of Flowers. The queen wondered if they had other things in common. Our little rose has a good many ladies waiting attendance on her, night and day.

image

*fans self*

(Source: natallie-dormer)